Today on Adventures in Subtlety: Turkeyville, we will explore the average day of Abby in her natural habitat of Cornwell's Turkeyville. Abby's day at work began with her arriving at the beautiful land with her cousin and sister on her sister's last day. Upon arrival, Abby realized she was on tables - which she was thankful for, considering it had the potential of being a busy day. Abby saw many of her good friends working and was excited, for she missed them very much during college, but didn't realize it until their reunion. The previous day she was on pies and it was a splendid day for young Abigail. Today was a good day, too, and filled with many adventures.
Really, only a couple of slightly interesting things happened for Abby this day. The first being the coffee incident. This is a classic example of something Abby would do as an embarrassment to herself. Now, there was supposed to be a group coming through at 6 o'clock for an open house - why someone would have to have their open house at Turkeyville is beyond me but that's beside the point - so Abby and her fellow coworkers were manning the stations, preparing for battle. Abby was checking everything, and she noticed the coffee pot was almost empty. Being the good worker that she is, she decided that another pot should be ran through. She drew back the curtain and exposed the different packages of powders and packages. She saw the green coffee packet that was labeled "decaff" and grabbed the silver package next to it. She cut open the package, poured it into the filter and went on getting drinks for customers. Soon after pulling down the handle marked "Tomlinson" and handing the second customer in a row their piping hot glass of freshly made coffee, Abby heard her manager calling her name. She looked up and was met with a confusing gaze by both her manager and her coworker at the register. The manager asked Abby if she had just made coffee. Abby responded assuredly with a yes and then a bit more tentatively when the manager pulled the shiny bag out of the trash can and asked if that was what she had used to make it. It was then that it dawned on Abby that the regular coffee was in the black bags, not silver. But what was in the silver bags? Iced tea. To make matters worse for Abby and the customer was the fact that there was still some coffee left in the pot, so instead of serving her customer a smooth glass of joe, she'd served him a vile concoction of old, bitter coffee and hot iced tea - a contradiction, I know. Now, poor Abby was just about flooded with shame and remorse for what the customer must have tasted. Black coffee and iced tea are terrible on their own, so combined it must taste like Satan in a cup, she thought as she quickly hurried into first to get the customer a cup of 100% regular coffee. After a profuse amount of apologies to both the customer and her manager, Abby forced herself just to laugh off her mistake and carry on with her day.
Later on, after everything had calmed and the fabulous employees were winding things down, Abby happened to overhear a couple of employees discussing different names for each other. Each of the guys in the kitchen decided they needed a feminine version of their own name - Abby's favorite being Rihanna. While this was going on, one of the kitchen guys was telling a restaurant worker that her stripper name would be Cinnamon. Now, Abby found this very funny, but couldn't tell her coworkers why, so she just chuckled to herself and thought about how badly she wanted to tell her friends.
The day of work ended with Abby's parents arriving to pick her up - since she rode with her sister and her sister was leaving for a location other than home. Although the day of work was done, the largest act of subtlety had yet to ensue. However, this didn't come from Abby, but from her dad. After coming outside, Abby's dad happened to notice a large white pickup truck sitting directly adjacent to Abby's sister's navy blue Malibu. In this truck sat a figure of a man. Now, clearly, this was not how it should be. This white pickup must be there for unsavory intentions. Why else would it be sitting in the employee parking lot next to the only other car there? Aside from them being there to pick up an employee, because obviously that couldn't have been the case. Being the sly guy that Abby's dad is, he decided to sit in his car until his daughter left on the off chance the white pickup may be there to follow them and kill them. Unfortunately for an exhausted Abby, her sister didn't happen to leave for a good five minutes after entering her car. The second the Malibu was put into drive, so was the white Oldsmobile that Abby's parents had taken as a mode of transportation to pick her up. Also soon after the Malibu was put into drive, the mysterious pickup next to it followed suit. However, instead of following Abby's sister and cousin, the truck instead pulled up into the front of the parking to - low and behold - pick up an employee. Shocking! Abby brushed off her dad's paranoia and was happy to leave her place of employment - for now.
This concludes today's Adventures in Subtlety: Turkeyville. Stay tuned for more!
